依家香港有幾荒謬，你知嘛？
Do you know how ridiculous Hong Kong has become?
依家既香港
This is what Hong Kong at this moment
- 無宣布戒嚴但戒嚴
No martial law in place but act like that have one
- 個袋有藥要有醫生紙，無就話係第一類管制藥品
Prescription drug become Class A drug
- 買嘢要有單，無既即係偷
You need to have a receipt otherwise will be treated as stolen good
- 釣魚要考牌，無就被人問點解枝魚杆咁長
You need a licence for fishing and you also need to explain why the fishing rod is that long.
- 話自己執行職務，但身上無証明文件
Claim to be the police but no warrant card to be shown or found
- 話自己執行職務，但可以吾記得著制服
Police can forget to put on the official uniform when carry out law enforcement work.
- 明明係死物，被人拉大隊去關心
Care for a damaged object other than the fresh and blood
- 明明係人，被人拉大隊當物件咁踢
Torturing a suspect but claiming kicking an object
- 唔可以一個人持有多過一張八達通
You can not holding more than one octopus card otherwise you will be treated a thief.
- 病左唔可以戴口罩出街
You can not wear mask when you are having a flu or other flu like symptoms.
- 唔可以著黑色衫
No black dress allowed or you will be arrested, beaten or assaulted.
- 唔可以嗌口號
Chanting is not allowed
- 唔可以帶遮出街
You can not carry any umbrella with you when you are out or you may be charged of having a “ concealed weapon “.
- 切月餅唔可以有餐刀
You will be charged with carrying an arm in public if you have a plastic knife for cake.
- 自己既電話仲要自己證明個電話點樣係自己既
You have to prove you own phone belong to you when question.
- 唔可以有鐳射筆
You can not own a lazer pointer otherwise you will be charge with owning a laser gun.
- 唔可以問 ＂良心去左邊＂
You are not allow to ask the police “where is your conscious. “ or you will be beaten the crap by a group of police.
- 無事唔可以去街
You should stay home if you have nothing else to do
- 唔可以話自己係市民
You are a nobody
- 見人受傷，唔可以幫人急救
You can not offer any first aid or other humanitarian aid when you see anyone get hurt.
- 見有不公義，唔可以拍攝
You can not take any photographs or video when you see any injustice occur
- 女人個胸係攻擊性武器
You will be charge for have an arm or conceal weapon if you have boob (man boobs for big fat so)
- 膠水樽係攻擊性武器
Plastic bottle will be considered as “weapon”
- 義務醫護比人話假記者
Volunteers medics will be treated a fake journalists
- 記者比人話暴徒
Journalists will be treated as rioters
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