你身邊有自戀狂朋友嗎?有沒有遇過極度自大的上司?他們過份自我感覺良好,歡迎別人的讚美同奉承,卻拒絕接受他人的意見,甚至會惱羞成怒。
很多人會覺得,這些人天生性格如此。但在阿姆斯特丹大學任教的Dr. Eddie Brummelman告訴我們,超級無敵自戀狂很大機會是教養出來的。
如果我地唔想培育出咁嘅子女,就要睇睇我哋呢條片喇~
參考資料
Brummelman, E. (2014, December 02). The problem with telling your kids they're 'special'. Retrieved from The Washington Post.
Brummelman, E., Thomaes, S., Nelemans, S. A., Castro, B. O., Overbeek, G., & Bushman, B. J. (2015). Origins of narcissism in children. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 201420870. doi:10.1073/pnas.1420870112
Brummelman, E., Nelemans, S. A., Thomaes, S., & Castro, B. O. (2017). When Parents’ Praise Inflates, Childrens Self-Esteem Deflates. Child Development, 88(6), 1799-1809. doi:10.1111/cdev.12936
Brummelman, E., Gürel, Ç, Thomaes, S., & Sedikides, C. (2018). What Separates Narcissism from Self-esteem? A Social-Cognitive Perspective. Handbook of Trait Narcissism, 47-55. doi:10.1007/978-3-319-92171-6_5
Markman, A., Ph.D. (2018, May 22). Narcissism Is Not Just High Self-Esteem. Retrieved from Psychology Today.
Pogosyan, M., Ph.D. (2018, September 27). Self-Esteem and Narcissism in Children. Retrieved from Psychology Today.
University of Amsterdam. (2017, September 28). Self-esteem in kids: Lavish praise is not the answer, warmth is. Retrieved from ScienceDaily.
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很多媽媽都會花很多時間跟初生BB聊天講故事,想好好陪伴他,不過部分人可能都試過被旁人潑冷水:「搞掂阿B食痾瞓咪得囉,佢咁細個邊識得咁多嘢啫。仲話要做全職媽媽湊仔添,其實請個人返嚟換片餵奶就得啦。」要照顧BB,放個人在旁邊就夠?事實真的如此?
參考資料
Egeland, B., & Sroufe, A. (1981). Developmental sequelae of maltreatment in infancy. New Directions for Child and Adolescent Development, 1981(11), 77-92. doi:10.1002/cd.23219811106
Engel, B. (2016). It wasnt your fault: freeing yourself from the shame of childhood abuse with the power of self-compassion. Strawberry Hills, NSW: ReadHowYouWant.
inzi-Dottan, R., & Karu, T. (2006). From Emotional Abuse in Childhood to Psychopathology in Adulthood. The Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, 194(8), 616-621. doi:10.1097/01.nmd.0000230654.49933.23
Schulte, B. (2013, September 16). Effects of child abuse can last a lifetime: Watch the ‘still face’ experiment to see why. Retrieved from The Washington Post
Spratt, E. G., Friedenberg, S., Larosa, A., Bellis, M. D., Macias, M. M., Summer, A. P., . . . Brady, K. T. (2012). The Effects of Early Neglect on Cognitive, Language, and Behavioral Functioning in Childhood. Psychology, 03(02), 175-182. doi:10.4236/psych.2012.32026
Streep, P. (2017, January 27). The Brutal Truth About 6 Types of "Quiet" Verbal Abuse. Retrieved from Psychology Today
Understanding the Effects of Maltreatment on Brain Development. (n.d.). Retrieved from Child Welfare Information Gateway
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之前我們曾嘗試從 BB 的角度出發,看看他們來到這個世界每日面對的新挑戰,但對新手父母而言,日以繼夜、夜以繼日地照顧小朋友,又何嘗不是天天面對不同難關?身心俱疲之餘,部份父母更會為了小朋友放棄自己的嗜好、減少出席朋友聚會等等,你以為會換來美好的親子關係,有助小朋友成長,但事實又是否這樣?
參考資料
Chau, V., & Giallo, R. (2014). The relationship between parental fatigue, parenting self-efficacy and behaviour: Implications for supporting parents in the early parenting period. Child: Care, Health and Development, 626-633.
Cooklin, A., Giallo, R., & Rose, N. (2011). Parental fatigue and parenting practices during early childhood: An Australian community survey. Child: Care, Health and Development Child Care Health Dev, 654-664.
Lesniowska, R., Gent, A., & Watson, S. (2015). Maternal fatigue, parenting self-efficacy, and overreactive discipline during the early childhood years: A test of a mediation model. Clinical Psychologist Clin Psychol.
Dunning, M., Seymour, M., Cooklin, A., & Giallo, R. (n.d.). Wide Awake Parenting: Study protocol for a randomised controlled trial of a parenting program for the management of post-partum fatigue. BMC Public Health, 26-26.
Weaver, C., Shaw, D., Dishion, T., & Wilson, M. (n.d.). Parenting self-efficacy and problem behavior in children at high risk for early conduct problems: The mediating role of maternal depression. Infant Behavior and Development, 594-605.
Rizzo, K. M., Schiffrin, H. H., & Liss, M. (2012). Insight into the Parenthood Paradox: Mental Health Outcomes of Intensive Mothering. Journal of Child and Family Studies J Child Fam Stud, 22(5), 614-620.
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