翻轉視界 18 Changing Perspective
There's not just one road to the destination, but many roads. You just need to take the little step that’s right in front of you, and then the next one, and a few years down the track, they will seem like massive achievements.
通往目的地的路不止一條，有很多路可走。你只需要邁出眼前這一小步，然後再邁出下一步，幾年下來，將會成為巨大成就。
文章來自於New Humans of Australia (有取得授權)
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I didn’t meet my father until I was 6 years old. My parents had a comfortable, middle-class life in Shanghai, or as close as you could get under communism. But they always wanted to live overseas, and just before I was born, my dad came to Sydney to set things up. I don’t know why, but in the end, my mother and I didn’t join him until I was 6.
•a middle-class life 中產階級生活
•set things up 打點一切
•live overseas 往海外生活
•in the end 最後 (表達在經過一段時間或一連串事件之後的結果)
直到六歲前我都未曾見過父親。我的雙親在上海過著舒適的中產階級生活，或著說，在共產階級下所能得到的最接近的生活。他們一直響往海外生活，就在我出生前，我父親來到雪梨打點一切。但不知何故，直到六歲那年我與母親才終於與父親團聚。
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Unfortunately, half a year after we arrived, he left us. That was a huge shock. Our transition had already been quite difficult, as we both didn't speak English. Also, as Shanghai was such a big bustling city, Sydney felt a bit like the countryside, especially on the weekends, as no shops were open back then!
•shock 令人震驚的事件（或經歷）；驚愕，震驚 (come as a great shock 讓人倍感震驚)
•transition 轉變；過渡
•a bustling city 繁華都會
不幸的是，就在我跟母親抵達半年後，父親離開了我們。這是個巨大的打擊，因爲我們不會說英文，在適應過渡期本就已過得相當艱辛。此外，不同於上海的繁華都會，雪梨更像鄉下，尤其在週末，那時連商店都不開門。
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We were very much reliant on my dad, not only financially, but also as a conduit into the wider community. So to have that broken was quite distressing. I remember Mum crying a lot. As we had become socially isolated, we didn’t find out anything about Centrelink, so we survived on her savings for a while, and then got some help from her family back in China.
•be reliant on… 依賴...
•a conduit into 進入...的渠道
•distressing (adj.) 令人苦惱的,令人擔憂的
•become socially isolated 變得孤立於社會
•survive on her savings 僅靠的她積蓄過日子
我們相當依賴我父親，不僅是經濟，他也是我們進入更廣泛社區的渠道。因此，當局面被打破時令人相當痛苦，我還記得母親時常哭泣。由於我們孤立於社會，所以我們並不知道澳洲社會福利聯絡中心 （Centrelink）的任何資訊，僅靠母親的積蓄支撐了一段時間，然後從母親在中國的娘家得到一些幫助。
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Eventually, Mum moved us down to Melbourne, where we were able to make some new networks and family friendships. But I was bullied a bit at school about things like my food and clothing! Whenever someone bullied me, I would defend myself, but because I didn’t have the language skills to explain to the teacher why, I got in trouble quite a bit. I ended up having to move school 3 times before I came to Balwyn Primary School, which was relatively multicultural.
•be able to 能夠
•make new networks 建立新的人脈，關係網
•be bullied 被霸凌
•language skills 語言能力
•get in trouble 惹上麻煩
•end up 最後處於；最後成爲；以…告終
•relatively 相對地
•multicultural 多元文化的
最後，母親帶著我搬遷到墨爾本，在那我們能夠建立起新的網絡與家庭情誼。然而。我在學校飽受霸凌，例如我的食物及衣物。每當有人霸凌我，我會自我防衛，但我的語言技巧不足以向老師解釋事發原因，因此常常陷入麻煩。後來我不得不再三轉學，直到就讀相對多元文化的博文小學（Balwyn Primary School）。
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After that, I did alright. Music featured very prominently in my life. I had started learning the violin from the age of 2.5 years old and even with all the troubles that were going on in my life, had somehow still kept up with it. As a result, I got a music scholarship to Trinity Grammar School. But even there I used to get into quite a lot of mischief, and would often skip school to go to the movies.
•do alight 過得不錯，做的不錯
•feature (v.) 以…為特色；給…以顯著的地位
•prominently 重要地；著名地；突出地，顯眼地
之後，我便過得不錯。音樂在我生活中佔有重要的一席之地，我從兩歲半開始學習小提琴，儘管生活中事事不如意，我依然堅持不輟。因此，我獲得三一文法學校（ Trinity Grammar School）的音樂獎學金。但即使在那，我也常惡作劇、逃學看電影。
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By the end of year 11, I was told I would have to either repeat the year, or consider going to another school, which was quite humiliating for my mum. I decided to move school and surprisingly, I ended up doing quite well in year 12! As a result, I ended up getting into a double degree in Law and Music at Monash.
•repeat the year 留級 ; 重唸一年
•humiliating 令人感到恥辱的，丟臉的
11年級結束時，我被告知要麽被留級，要麼考慮轉學，這對我母親來說相當丟人。我決定轉學，而令人驚訝的是，我在12年級的時候表現優異，最後錄取蒙納士大學法律與音樂雙學位。
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When I started, my first thought was that I didn’t belong because I had done so badly in school up to year 11 and everyone else seemed so smart. But I put my head down, got through it, and ended up getting a job in the legal department of a major manufacturing company, which was a different approach to what most law students do.
•do not belong 不屬於這
•put my head down 埋頭苦幹
•the legal department of ...的法律部門
•a different approach 不同途徑
•approach （思考問題的）方式，方法，態度
當我開始進入大學，最初的想法是我不屬於這，因為我在11年級前都表現不佳，而這裡的人似乎都聰明絕頂。但我埋頭苦幹，咬牙撐過，最後在一家大型製造公司的法律部門找到工作，這與多數法律系學生的途徑不同。
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I really enjoyed it. It was hard work, but I learned a lot of foundational business, legal and corporate communication skills. After that I worked in corporate governance in RMIT, then started to moonlight as a lecturer in the Law Faculty. Eventually, they asked me if I wanted to do a PhD and I blindly said yes! I next worked at Swinburne University, and then was head-hunted to lead the corporate legal team at the Commercial Passenger Vehicles Commission.
•foundational 基礎的
•communication skills 溝通技巧
•corporate governance
•moonlight (v.) （尤指瞞著僱主）從事第二職業，兼職
•headhunt (v.) 物色（人才）； 挖角
•legal team 法律團隊
我非常喜歡這份工作，這是份辛苦的工作，但我學習了很多基礎商業、法律以及公司溝通技巧。之後我在皇家墨爾本理工大學（ RMIT）從事公司治理工作，並開始兼職擔任法律系講師。後來他們問我是否想要讀博士，我便盲目地答應了。接下來，我在斯威本大學（Swinburne University）工作，再被挖角到商用小客車委員會領導法律團隊。
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I had a good life, but after a while, I realised I wanted a different kind of job. I could see my seniors were making a lot of money but that their family life was not that good. And looking at my own upbringing, I wanted to be the kind of father who could be present in my own kids’ lives. So I decided on dentistry. It would not only allow me to use the hand skills that I had developed from playing the violin, but also the analytical and reasoning skills that I'd developed in law. Plus it would be flexible, and offer me a stable income and the chance to meet different people every day!
•upbringing 教養
•decide on sth 決定某事或東西
•analytical and reasoning skills 分析和推理能力
•offer a stable income 提供穩定收入
我的生活很不錯，但一段時間後，我意識到自己想要一份不同的工作。我知道前輩們賺了很多錢，但他們的家庭生活並不美滿。看著自己的成長經歷，我想要成為可以在孩子生活中出席的父親，所以我決定改行當牙醫。這項職業能讓我使用從拉小提琴中發展出的手部技巧，也能運用我在法律中發展出的分析與推理技能。此外，這個職業相當靈活，能為我提供穩定收入，並有機會每天與不同的人見面。
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My now fiancée, who was my girlfriend at the time, was also applying for further study, and coincidentally we both got into university in South Australia, so we moved to Adelaide together a few years ago.
•fiancée 未婚妻
•at the time 當時
•apply for 申請
•further study 繼續教育，進修；進一步研究；深造
•coincidentally 碰巧地；巧合地
我的未婚妻，當時的女友，也申請繼續深造，巧的是我們都考上南澳大學（University of South Australia)，所以幾年前一起搬到阿得雷德（ Adelaide）。
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I was lucky to get a university job at Flinders University. Initially, I started out as a casual lecturer in the law school, but I’ve since transitioned into teaching health law and research, and I’m currently writing a few books on the intersection between law and medicine. And also, obviously, trying to finish my dentistry degree!
•start out as… 起初擔任...
•transition into… 轉變到...
我很幸運的在福林德斯大學（Flinders University）找到工作，起初我在法學院擔任臨時講師，但我後來轉換到醫事法教學及研究。目前我正撰寫幾本關於法律與醫學相接的書籍，並努力完成我的牙醫學位。
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Mum eventually retrained as a Chinese high school teacher, and she’s still teaching to this day. Like most first generation migrants, she struggled quite a lot, and invested heavily in my success. After we’re married, my fiancée and I are planning to have children, and I’m sure they will have it much easier than I did.
•retrain 重新培養；再培訓；再訓練
•to this day 至今
•first generation migrants 第一代移民
•struggle a lot 掙扎奮鬥許久
•have it much easier 過的比較輕鬆
我的母親最終重新接受培訓，成為一名中文高中老師並執教至今。如同大多數第一代移民，她掙扎奮鬥許久，並為我的成功投資甚多。我與未婚妻打算婚後生孩子，我確信孩子會過的比我輕鬆得多。
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Still, a lot of the failures that I’ve had in my life have really informed a lot of my successes. Looking back, I wouldn't really want to change that to have a smoother life.
•inform [正式] 影響某人的態度或意見
https://www.ldoceonline.com/dictionary/inform
•have a smoother life 有一個更順遂的人生
我的生活中的種種失敗確實為我的成功提供借鑑。回首過去，我不會想要改變那些坎坷經歷去擁有一個更順遂的人生。
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Over the years, I've learned that perseverance is very important. I hope that through telling my story, I can be an example to others who might be in a similar position as I was: to show that there's not just one road to the destination, but many roads. You just need to take the little step that’s right in front of you, and then the next one, and a few years down the track, they will seem like massive achievements.
•over the years 多年來
•perseverance 不屈不撓，堅持不懈
•be an example 成為榜樣
•be in a similar position 處於相似的處境
•down the road/line/track 將來(的路)
多年來，我學到堅持不懈是至關重要的。我希望透過講述自己的故事，能成為其他可能與我有相似處境的人的榜樣：向他們展示通往目的地的路不止一條，有很多路可走。你只需要邁出眼前這一小步，然後再邁出下一步，幾年下來，將會成為巨大成就。
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Photographer: Paul Heinrich instagram.com/paulfheinrich
文章與圖片出處: https://bit.ly/2XJsciq
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翻轉視界: http://bit.ly/3fPvKUs
批判性思考問題大全: http://bit.ly/34rdtJ7
2歲半 教養 在 [寶寶] 兩歲半孩子的教養問題？ - 看板BabyMother - 批踢踢實業坊 的推薦與評價
家中男寶2Y6M，
頭一年媽媽我自己請育嬰假帶，無後援
之後回職場送托嬰中心至今..
一直以來都是個規律謹慎的孩子，
尤其兩歲後漸漸懂事感到輕鬆許多，
結果今年四月弟弟到來後一切都變調，
現在主要照顧者為爸爸，非常黏爸爸，
雖然之前我帶了他一年，
但寶寶跟爸爸比較投緣，喜歡跟爸爸玩，
生活上我們夫妻完全以他為重心，
下班後就是幾乎沒有個人時間的陪伴他，
所以他也很習慣這樣的關愛，也很乖
從四月份弟弟出生後，
我一樣請育嬰在家帶一年，
哥哥變本加厲的像無尾熊一樣八著爸爸，
然後上演各種哭鬧，
大體都是些小事不順心，或是心情煩悶，
總之就是一個點不對了瞬間就開啟這模式，
目前採取的模式就是冷處理，
但孩子脾氣也很倔強，可以哭一個半小時，
然後持續上演，嚴重時一天可發作3次！
而且只認爸爸哄，其他人誰都不要～
爸爸要上班，下班後還要面臨這些哭鬧，
超級心力交瘁阿～～～
我們自認在處理弟弟這個議題已經付出比平時更多的關愛跟耐性，
想想有時都覺得有點對不起小寶，
必要時打屁股、或是罰站等方法都試過了，
每次的哭鬧結束後都好好跟他說道理，
覺得兒子是聽得懂的但下次脾氣ㄧ來還是如此
這樣的情況是正常的嗎？
是知道2-3歲正難搞的年紀，但還是豪恐怖呀！
還是有可能弟弟出生後突然對爸爸產生分離焦慮嗎？
上述的情形大家有更好的教養方法嗎？
真是軟的不吃硬的也不吃，
打不怕也罵不聽，而且不想一直對孩子動手，
覺得好棘手喔= =只能替崩潰的爸爸發問惹～
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