Be Who You Are, Not What Others Want You To Be!❤
Why are you single? When are you going to get married? When are you having kids? Why you don't have kids? Why is she/he divorced? What happened to them? Why are they like that? Why and why and why people like to ask these insensitive questions, being prejudice, stereotyping, speculates, gossips, and make inappropriate judgments.
How can you ask something that someone can't 100% control, just like death? Some things are unknown, it's like asking, when are you going to die? It's common sense. If you don't know this answer, means you won't know the exact why for such questions.
When someone is single by choice or it's not just the right time for them, let it be. So what if that person wants to be or will be single forever? It may be better for the person than being with the wrong partner for the rest of the person's life. You don't meddle with God's plan or even someone's choices. You can't force people to get into relationships, what's more marriage. If it is forced, how can a marriage be happy and whole? Love is a huge topic. Again it's not just about relationships and marriage.
People should not pretend to be stupid, play dumb, needy, spoiled, or fake just to attract/be with a life partner. Women and men should have their own intelligence, personality, independence, and truthfulness in life. We want to be real and genuine, and if someone wants us to be part of their life, it's better for them to know the real us from the get-go. Not presenting a false front.
A healthy relationship should be two individuals who love and care for each other, support, motivate, respect, be kind, honest, loyal, help, guide, communicate well, listen and give the very best to each other, by also being the best version of themselves. Not one person should be superior to the other or vice versa. If you feel forced and put yourself down for another person, you are probably in the wrong relationship.
Put aside status, education level, salary, or position in career, a partner and a healthy relationship should be side by side, be supportive, help each other, understand each other strengths and weaknesses, able to give and take/compromise, and open to learning from each other when it comes to marriage or any relationship.
A woman's or man's characteristics for example being soft or strong, and men prefer soft/more feminine women, and women who are less intelligent/educated than them, should not be generalized. Some men admire women who are intelligent/educated, strong, and independent and women have their preferences too. Different people are attracted to different traits. No one size fits all.
No one should pretend to be less than she/he is for the opposite partner to feel desirable or dominant. If a person desperately and constantly trying to boost their ego, be dominant or prove power especially in a relationship, this may lead to negative behavioral patterns and impacts such as emotional instability, harassment, abuse, bullying, verbal and physical violence, unhappiness, and depression.
We are all individuals in the end and have our differences. As a human being, one of the goals in life is trying to be better than we were yesterday. Trying to change ourselves for the sake of pleasing someone and pretending just to make someone feel happy or superior is not healthy and can jeopardize our own mental health and also the relationship in the long run.
If we want to change something, for example, I want to be more fitter, healthier, happier, smarter, financially independent, and so forth, it is for ourselves (without being selfish or self-absorbed). If we take care of ourselves first then we can take care of others better. Do for yourself and the motivation will be sustainable than doing for other people.
Respect and love yourself. Respect the people around you. Then we should not be degrading or intimidate anyone. This will make you a better person. We attract what we are.
Life is unique, so does human beings. Life itself is bigger than getting married, having kids, make tons of money, and so forth. This is the typical life cycles, stages and goals we all have learned in our life. The strong pressures in society dictate what is better and not just because that's what it is for the past generations have been. The pressure to fit in with society's standards and expectations is also there.
As a society and individual, let's understand deeper that not everyone will have the same life cycles and even life goals. There are things we can control and can't control. Not everything that is good for you is going to be good for other people. Having or not having something can be a blessing and sometimes only God knows why.
In life, some may walk their path of life and make choices completely different from us and that's perfectly fine. We all have our own unique journey and that makes us different, and we can use that differences to make life better for ourselves and the life of others.
Let this sink in.
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同時也有1部Youtube影片,追蹤數超過250萬的網紅Joanna Soh Official,也在其Youtube影片中提到,Xandria Ooi is a Happiness Advocate. She creates daily videos to inspire and motivate people to practice a happy and positive mindset with simple, eas...
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Here's how to do what you love and still be able to pay the bills 💵
1️⃣ "Do what you love and money will follow” is a lie. Many of us love that lie. I loved that lie and I wished it was the truth. But it isn’t.
2️⃣ If you want to have your own thing (be free from the 9-to-5). Doing what you love alone is not enough. You also need to make sure others love what you do. Learn how to be an entrepreneur. Do what you love AND offer your people what they need.
3️⃣ You need to have a healthy relationship with money, heal your money wounds, transform limiting money beliefs, and know how to take good care of your money, how to save, spend, invest, etc.
4️⃣ If you’re unwilling to learn the above, here are the scenarios: You won’t have much money so you’ll need to make ends meet with less. Or you’ll need to have a day job to fund your passion. Or you’ll need financially-capable parents or a spouse to support you. Or you’ll need to partner up with someone and let them take care of the business side of things. Or you’ll need to seek out employment that pays you to do exactly what you love.
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Doing what you love and still being able to control the bills are what you'll find in my recent article. Enjoy reading! 💛
how to be a good partner in a relationship 在 Careen Tan - careentan.com Facebook 的精選貼文
A healthy marriage requires consistent reflection. Just like how we review our finances or performances at work, should we do so for our relationships. After close to 8 years of being married, if you asked me to pick just one key to a happy and healthy marriage, I would say it’s Kindness.
The funny thing about us humans is that the closer we are to someone, the easier it is for us to take them for granted. And sometimes it feels easier to be kind to a stranger or a friend than to be kind towards our partner. When we have disagreements with a friend, we’re kind enough to withhold words that hurt and just agree to disagree, but when it comes to our partner, a lot of times we don’t hesitate throwing words that would make a dent in our relationship.
Kindness is one of the most valuable things I have learned in our 16-year relationship, and this kindness spills over from us to those around us. Kindness starts from the marriage to the home, and to everyone and everything else. It doesn’t happen overnight, and only through practice when rubber meets the road- when we have a choice to say those words to feel good and feel right, or to withhold our tongue and speak the truth in love.
Thank you for staying with me as I’m being moulded to be a better wife and individual. Still a work-in-progress, always will be, but I’m glad I get to change through life along with you.
Love you @mysoncallsmebuun ♥️
how to be a good partner in a relationship 在 Joanna Soh Official Youtube 的精選貼文
Xandria Ooi is a Happiness Advocate. She creates daily videos to inspire and motivate people to practice a happy and positive mindset with simple, easy-to-understand concepts and reminders. Subscribe to her channel here: https://www.youtube.com/user/xandriaooi
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When we fall in love with someone, it’s because we have things in common. So naturally, our mind’s hooked on to the idea that we’re similar. But, whilst we may have similarities with our partner, we’re extremely different people.
No matter how alike we are on the surface, no matter how much we love each other, it’s extremely important to have the mindset that this person is an individual who comes from a completely different background, upbringing, mindset or even culture.
Because expectations is the cause of most problems in a relationship, and the expectation that we are the same causes disappointment and frustration and resentment when our partner doesn’t get us; but the acknowledgement that we very different people who love each other leads us down the path of patience and seeking to understand even when there’s a disagreement.
The work of any relationship lies in the ability to rise above things that trigger us, that sets us off. It requires more mental practice than simply good intentions, because we can have all the good intentions in the world when we’re in a good mood and things are going well, but the moment we’re frustrated or angry, life-long habits are triggered and we react negatively despite our good intentions.
When we’re in a relationship, we may be in a team, but we’re two very different people on the same team. Whether or not we’re able to adjust to the differences depends on our own mental and emotional capabilities. So working at our relationships means constantly working on ourselves.
Love is amazing, but love isn’t enough in a relationship, because it takes empathy, understanding and a lack of expectations to still be kind and to still be loving even when we’re angry. That’s the work of a relationship, and it’s the kind of work that will pay off both for our own self-development and the quality of our relationship, where we’ll be able to be happy, always.
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