JANGAN IZINKAN IBU LAHIRKAN TUANNYA
Masa awal aku kahwin dengan isteri aku, aku dapat pakej 4 orang anak. Alhamdulillah. Yang mana 2 daripada 4 ni istimewa sikit. Dua-dua aspergers. Sorang ADD sorang lagi ADHD. Paling mencabar sekali tau tak apa? Anak-anak ni sebelum kehadiran aku, diorang ni di manjakan betul. Cukup manja! Semua nak, dapat. Tak boleh kena tegur, mesti menaangis dan membentak. 3 lelaki, sorang perempuan. Masa tu umur yang sulung 14 tahun. Yang second 12 tahun...
Continue ReadingDON ' T ALLOW MOTHER TO BORN HER MASTER
When I married my wife, I got a package of 4 children. Thank God. Which 2 of the 4 is a little special. Both aspergers. Another ADD another ADHD. It's most challenging to know it's okay? These kids before my presence, they are being pampered right. Pretty spoiled! All want, got it. Can't be told, must cry and snap. 3 men, a woman. At that time the eldest was 14 years old. The second 12 years old. Third 9 years old. Fourth of 6 years old girl.
First time entering the family, I've had a meeting done. With gangster style, long hair braids. I'm doing a LIVE FB meeting with children. In the meeting, I just entered the family, so follow my rules. I don't follow their rules.
At the beginning, many people who are nearest have started tripping and spreading stories, not saying that I will hit the kids. The swing bowl is right who reads people from this person's use.
Remember the early marriage, my wife always reminds me of me. If these kids promise anything they need to be fulfilled, they will cry badly and scream. Hard to persuade. Sometimes I want to break my breath and cry. The other one is ADHD if he cries, he can't be angry, he has to say it carefully. Because later he will be raging and coming hyper. The one who added is his own attitude. It's just his problem that he doesn't take the port. The eldest is the most pamper. Ask for whatever the confirmation gets. After that it's urgent to work.
I really don't feel like I'm suitable at all. What should I do? Wash his mother first. My wife cried when she washed her first. I said it's simple. I don't want my son to grow up to die and get everything he wants to wear. Nothing, tomorrow won't be given, he rebel like going crazy.
Everything that my wife says can't do, I prove it to my wife, everything that she thinks is wrong. I made it. I didn't see anyone doing what my wife said. I just tried to bring MCD, then I parked at the Tomyam shop. Look at all the faces that are slammed. But no one is crying.
That's where it all started. Until one part I saw my wife still wrongly. I said it's simple.
′′ Want something big, need a big sacrifice. If you maintain like this, it's too wrong that you have to follow all your child's wishes, you're afraid to say NO and then you're crying and tired of your brother Trust me. Just like this, you'll lose your brother. Choose. ′′ ′′
Hah my wife was shaking at that time.
Yes, it's not easy to fight the mother's instinct. I really understand. But have to remember, you want to be sad until when you just want to entertain the extreme motherhood instincts? How do you want your child to grow up? What's he doing today, he's already big tomorrow. You're poor, he asks for something you can't fulfill. You think he got it? That's the wrong time he just said this sentence.
′′ Why is my mom not like someone else's mom. It's okay. I am not important ′′
Heart was shaking at that time. He didn't tell me 100 times, once didn't let him release such a painful sentence?
I'm nothing, kids like this even more men, have to grow up to be men. Not a bapok, not a Kpop. Man. The world will come far more evil. Responsibility is far bigger. It is compulsory to grow up to be a man. I repeat.
MEN.
That's when my wife slowly became a mad mother. Kah kah kah. The kids were shocked at that time. Suddenly mom is good at screaming? Suddenly mom is good at tunjal head? Suddenly mom is good at slapping? Suddenly mom dares to throw her phone against the wall?
Most power if a child I say near her mother,
′′ Mom doesn't love me, I hate mom.."
If my wife used to hear this verse, she will feel sinful and crying. Now you know what my wife answer?
′′ Once you hate me, 100 times I hate you.."
Stunned again child. Feels like the tactical of playing sentiment is not going to be. Continue to continue doing homework.
After that the scene of running away from the middle of the night, haa my wife is already cuak. Look for me to tell my child to run home. Cleaning up the bag. If you're as a mother, are you rocking? 10-year-olds when they were running home. Other siblings are busy trying not to run away, they insist on running.
I told my wife I'm happy je.
′′ Do not persuade. Just ask him to run the house faster. Go help her pack the bag. Do not worry. I used to threaten my mother like this when I was small. When my mother is stupid, I stay outside for a while and then I will go home because it's scary outside the dark.. if you persuade, don't run away, believe Tomorrow he's busy threatening to run again."
My wife went down and asked her to leave her house faster. This kid won't go out after opening the door. Look at the dark outside. He immediately opened the saji headscarf, making him hungry. It's so hard to look at it.
Want to turn into a Lion, it looks evil. Many will talk about this. You say you don't love your children. If this part is not strong, it will be stupid to be eaten by these words. But you have to believe one thing. This mother and father knows her child better than all of you. He knows so much. Know which limit he can make or not. We who watch from outside don't pretend to teach other people's children, teach our own children first to let go. Look at our children today he appreciate us how.
I was worst being criticized at that time.
He said since my wife married me, my wife's attitude has changed. Getting harder. Fierce with the kids. And many more lah. I'm lazy to take a port. The one who speaks is a woman who has never tasted anything. Work is great. So bored listening to it. But I'm cooking so much, it's normal that the sound of this person's confirmation since childhood has never lived hard, the child and the one that is like diva is usually the same. Just deaf the ear. Focus on the mission for the good of the child to come.
After 3 years, I recently had a meeting with all my children. I ask, did you notice that mom used to be different from now?
All bobbing. Getting more ferocious and crazy people say.
I'm so happy to hear. Let go of that I said.
′′ Try all of you to look back at this day. What's the difference? Neno 8 years old can be brushed by school clothes. Already able to wipe Ayra out. Luth 10 years can wash everyone's dishes. Hoze is the most improvement. From my own world today, you are the most helping to work in your house. 13 years old, washing clothes, hanging clothes, sleeping ayraa, bathing ayraa. And many more. Anish, you are the eldest brother. Thank God. No more pushy. See you already understand the reality of being a brother. Every morning sitting in the kitchen helping mom cook.. that's okay. Proud for a while Dedi. Dedi is nothing, you ask Dedi's siblings if they are rude to his mother, what happens to them. Must eat Dedi's feet. You become a son, you have to be a protector to your mother. Don't make it a slave mother."
All sighs. I'm connecting again.
′′ Do you know why this Seremban house Dedi doesn't install air conditioner near Indeed Dedi doesn't let mom install air conditioner. Let me sleep hot. Learning how to use a fan. Dedi used to grow up but never sleeps in air conditioner, thank God I grew up healthy. Dedi wants anything can't just get like that. So men have to learn how to feel hard. So that tomorrow, you will learn to be grateful. I will remember your parents when they are happy. You'll be close to siblings, tomorrow this is what you'll laugh back when you tell the story. Trust me. All of these are the sweetest memories. Mother and father don't know when will die. Maybe tomorrow we die, at least Anish can take care of the younger siblings."
Everyone was laughing at that time. My eldest child will interrupt in a while.
′′ Dedi, but honestly Anish likes the current mother from mother before. Even though it's fierce, but it's true when I remember it again. All of us are good at all. I just noticed that someone else is 8 years old but doesn't even know how to take care of the baby who is a year old and shower and defecate. Luth has changed a lot. No more crying. Hardworking. Hoze has changed a lot of crazy. Playing with the phone. There's only one problem, when you have a relative, you can come, don't sit in the Just sit down once. Anyway, I swear, Anish loves the mother who was now from the old times. Even though the current mother is crazy saiko! Haha. Mom, you are Queen Of My Heart! Mother is crazy, before Anish didn't understand a lot. When Anish sees mom struggle, Anish becomes a pity. Just saw all the sacrifices of the mother for all of us."
Others bobbing heads agree and laugh with what brother anish he said.
All impressed when I remember back. Until neno's turn, she keeps crying. She really apologizes near her mom.
The most powerful, they are siblings when their aunt wants to ask them to come out. Each one has completed the job of who managed his / her sister's clothes this year, who will beat his / her younger sibling's pampers, who will manage his / her sister's pampers. All of them think for themselves. Talk to each other and manage the equipment of his little brother who is a year old. No need to have a mother with her dedi.
Power, isn't it? Two Aspergers, an ordinary person. The eldest has entered MRSM. It means that the number two child of ADD is taking over.
Even when I'm going back to hometown, my wife just gave me an order. They all clean up their own bags. My wife doesn't even mix a single dust. My wife looks like a big boss today. All homeworks are managed by the child. My wife's duty is to cook. Wash clothes, dry clothes, wash dishes, wash toilets, throw away garbage, shower ayra for a year, all the kids who manage it.
If I don't move, I won't let my wife shout out to other children. But mad at the eldest child. Let the eldest child be stressed. Whatever happened to the younger siblings, I told her mother to kill her eldest child. So when the younger siblings aren't working, fighting, the eldest brother already knows that he needs to be tiaw with his mother later. Didn't say much, he just settled his younger siblings. That's it brother!
Thank God. The story is only one. Our children, we know each other. There's a part of being fierce, there's a part that needs to be There's a part that can laugh. This mother has one veto power, but many are afraid to use it because she is not in other s' language and is so afraid that her child will hate It doesn't mean anything! It's boring to entertain the sentiment of pity that is extreme. You used to be your mother who hit your face, do you hate your mother to big? Nothing. We're fierce because we just want to educate. Not fierce all the time. More than firm. When you see your child hardworking, listen to it, there's a day that will give you a surprise Chocolate or what? Taking a walk to the park. Time with family has to be there.
If you're too spoiled, you can make your child become responsible and the person who will defend your family, I think that the Malay soldiers won't even be training hard as hard as possible. It's better for them to just pray for all the new soldiers. What do you want, everything is given. Wake up late, swipe your hair and then kiss your forehead. Even eating time is delicious. Sleeping at night comfortably, installing air conditioner. Put on the wifi.
What was it?
Before you want to say this person, ask ourselves first. Our 7-year-old child eats, is he good at washing his own dishes? Do you know how to follow your time schedule? Can you brush your own school clothes?
If you're not good at anything, don't make me feel bad about the way other father's mother educate someone's child.
The hardest episode in educating children at this age. Believe me, this will all be a longing for the kids when they leave the house later. And this also makes them siblings get closer.
Patience, victory day is coming! Early sacrifice is the most important. Fight all the wrong feelings that always play in the soul. Only one thing you have to remember, as long as you don't fight with religion. Mom is never wrong! Angry, fierce lah. Do not worry. Continue to educate our ways. Don't forget the power of Veto!
Eh forgot, waimah is a special child. What the doctor said put number two. Accompanying kids like normal kids before but there's a limit. Don't teach him to be a special child since you were young. We know our children again, right? Because I always believe, crazy people when we clap their hands twice when they want to take our food, the third time they will understand and won't take it anymore. That's the crazy person. So, Don't let the child know he's special. Don't disturb her brain. Just entertaining the same thing.
Everyone is like that. If he feels like there are advantages, there is someone who defends more, he will start to get a chance. Can't believe it? You try to pamper your child crazy. Let go of the try in front of you, someone tease him less, you see how he has torn to tears later he will get your attention.
Anyway..
Only one thing I'm still failing. Failed to change their name call among siblings. No call Along, Angah, Bangde. I feel strongly, calling this name also has a certain advantage to put the difference between the younger brother and brother. There is a family aura.
Don't forget, Father's role in psychology is important to be crazy. Because with this mother, no matter how fierce it is, the child is brave to fight. Dad must be good at playing roles. No need to touch, you need to know when you want to have a high voice. When you want to call your child, sit down and talk about others.
Become a child idol.
Trust me, step child and biological child two things that are impossible. Because the power of VETO only exists in biological children. This step child has a risk that you need to face. What happened to them, people will say that you don't love them because it's not your biological child. Painful and sad that sentence is for me. Allah knows how I love them.
I wrote it,
Mr Amir Lake
P / s: In the past my wife was criticized by the Aspie group when my wife said she educated her aspie's child in the way she was a little firm. All sorts of people are teasing, he said that this aspie child will take revenge and kill him. Have to be teased every day. Poor. My wife doesn't agree with my actions early because she holds the doctor's order. Today, I'm asking my child aspie. Tomorrow if mom gets disturbed by someone else in front of you what will you do? What did he answer? I'll hit him enough! And I asked my wife, how about the person who teased her child? He said his child is under control but sometimes he's raging badly until he's about to breath. At the same time today my child aspie is good at cooking, can do all homework and love his siblings so much.
Mr. Amir Lake creditTranslated
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说一说…..父母
前一阵子,参加了一个心灵课程。
一位三十岁左右的男人出来做分享。
他在新加坡工作,去年得知妈妈的癌症复发,而且还开始扩散,心里很难过,也很纠结。
他问了一个长辈朋友他该选择留在新加坡继续打拼事业还是辞职回去陪伴妈妈?
那位长辈朋友跟他说了自己亲生的经历。
长辈朋友说他年轻的时候,母亲患癌症,他带着母亲到处寻医,希望可以把母亲治好。
最后有位医生跟他说,他的母亲只剩一个月的命。
他致电给远在国外念医学系的弟弟,告诉他这个消息。
他的弟弟几年前获得了某间著名大学的医科奖学金,一个人到国外升学。
他还剩四个月就毕业,正式成为一个专业医生。
他跟教授申请一个月的假期,希望自己可以陪母亲走完她最后的人生。
结果教授不领情,说如果他这时候停学,就没办法毕业。
后来,他跟教授说,他很谢谢教授这几年对他的照顾和教导,但母亲只有一个,于是他选择了停学,回到家乡照顾妈妈。
长辈朋友说,他的弟弟归来后,每天无微不至照顾卧床的母亲,喂食,洗澡,清洗排泄物….。
而母亲在孩子细心的照顾和陪伴下多活了三个月才离开人间。
听完长辈朋友的故事,他决定辞职,回到他成长的土地,回到那个赐予他生命的母亲身边。
他的妈妈因为不想再承受多年前做化疗的幸苦,于是选择自然疗法。
他陪着妈妈一起学习气功,一起练习。
当妈妈学习遇到障碍时,他耐心教导妈妈,陪伴她一次又一次的练习。
这一次她带着妈妈,甚至爸爸一起来上课,三人之间的交流一天比一天温暖,一天比一天更往内心深处流动。
你可以看见这个三十的大男孩,边哽咽边诚恳地分享他内心的感受时,脸上闪耀着光芒,他的孝心滋养着他的生命,富足了他的灵魂,也感动了所有聆听的每一颗心。
你可以看见他患癌的妈妈因为他的爱而流露出幸福的笑容。
你可以看见他踏出的每一步是如何地一点一点软化了平时大男人的爸爸,让老夫老妻的爸妈重新感受相爱的甜蜜。
这段分享一直在我心中流淌,像安静清澈的河流,流过之处都获得了一份滋润。
今年农历过年前,九十几岁的外公中风跌倒,摔断了腿,也检查出食道收窄而必须插鼻胃管进食。
外公一向喜欢独居,就算孩子怎么相劝,他还是不愿意搬去跟任何一个孩子居住。
于是妈妈在家里附近准备了一个房子给外公住,方便照顾他老人家。
这个区可热闹了,小弟,大舅,表妹,两个表弟都住在附近,而二弟和二弟媳就住在正对面,很多照应。
外公出院后,爸妈,三个阿姨和舅舅们每天轮班,24小时在身边照顾卧床的外公。
有个专业护士来给外公做护理和检查时,跟他们说以她的经验观察,外公可能没办法坚持到过完年。
妈妈致电给我,让我有点心理准备。
农历年回家乡时,本来妈妈阿姨们已经订好餐厅一共六桌酒席给外公和我一起庆祝生日,因为我们两人是同一天生日,而且经常很靠近或在过年期间,已经有好几年,我都和阿公一起接受大家的生日祝福,一起许愿,一起吹蜡烛,切蛋糕。而这一次,阿公不止不能庆祝生日,而且长辈们也交代我们不要提这件事,因为在马来西亚华人的传统习俗里,老人家病重忌过生日。
于是所有的孩子,孙子和曾孙子每天都到外公家拜年,聚餐,非常热闹。
外公虽然行动不便,但躺在床上静静的聆听子孙们欢乐的声音,让他觉得很开心,嘴角不自觉微微上扬,好像这些陪伴就是他最好的良药。
他不停吩咐阿姨一定要记得帮他准备好红包,他要亲自给我们每人一个红包。
“爸,新年快乐,身体健康…阿公,恭喜发财,身体健康….阿祖,恭喜发财…。“我们七十几个人沿着客厅到厨房排成长长的队伍,一个一个握着阿公的手,从他手上接过那封非常珍贵的红包。
过完年,回到家,每天和妈妈通电话跟进外公的情况。
一天一天细心的照顾下和子孙每天的陪伴下,外公不止渡过了整个农历年,还自行拔掉鼻胃管(因为太不舒服),然后神奇的开始可以自己进食。
前几天,弟媳传来一条短片,一打开,看见外公竟然可以站起来慢慢的步行了。
这一次新冠肺炎疫情在全球大爆发,欧洲许多独居和疗养院的老人,在未接受正式治疗下,在家或疗养院孤独离世。
而小黄花慈善教育基金会也在行动管制令期间为一些贫穷的独居老人提供免费粮食。
以前和阿姨们一起探访过一间老人院,院长说他看到越来越多的老人院开设,心里觉得很悲哀。
我们现代人引以为傲,这越来越先进,越来越文明,科技越来越发达,物品越来越精致,教育程度越来越高的都市里,为什么就容纳不下这些前半辈子都在为社会为家庭付出的生命呢?
他们曾经也是年轻气盛,朝气蓬勃的劳动者,为什么在他们最需要被关怀,被爱护,被疼爱的最后的岁月里却被遗忘甚至遗弃?
越来越多的优越感并没能让我们感受越来越多的快乐,越来越争取的私人空间让人们的距离越拉越远……。
远到我们都看不见一些真正重要和值得珍惜的人和事。
这些老人们的家人呢?
也许背后有很多很多的故事,但这些故事是不是也许可以因为少一点的自我,多一点的同理心而被改写呢?
宇宙创造生命,而父母就是带这些生命来到这个世界的桥梁。
为什么我们可以把最好的给孩子,却不能把最好的给父母?
好友奶茶一个人照顾奶奶,爸爸和妈妈三个老人家,经常就是走路去看他们,陪他们,给他们煮好吃的,大小事都替他们打点。
每次看到她分享和奶奶,爸妈的合照,影片和文字时,心里都特别感动。
她堂堂一个影后,视后,歌后,平日的生活里,就是一个尽心尽力在照顾上面三个老人和下面一个孩子的平凡妈妈,女儿和孙女。
去年,我和一个好友探访一家慈善收留所,里头住了六十几位失智老人,他们都是因为各种各样的原因而被收留,有一些偶尔有家人来探望,有一些甚至无人问津。
看着那些老人枯萎的身躯躺在床上,空洞地望向远方,任由孤寂一寸一寸地侵蚀他的灵魂,生命就在这暗淡的小屋里渐渐地走向死亡,心里很是难过。
让我们闭上眼,回想小时候,父母辛苦照顾我们的身影,安静下来,感受一下现在的父母,我们是不是还可以聆听到他们的声音,感受彼此连接的温暖?
Let’s talk about….. Parents
Just recently, I participated in a spiritual class. There was a man, in his thirties who did a sharing session. He works in Singapore and last year, he learned that his mother’s cancer had recurred and it had begun to spread. He felt a wave of sad and complicated emotions overcome him.
He asked an elderly friend for advice, if he should choose to stay in Singapore to pursue his career or resign to accompany his mother?
This elderly friend of his then shared his own experience with him. When he was young, his own mother had cancer and he brought his mother around to seek for medical treatment, hoping to be able to cure her. Alas, one doctor gave him one news he would not want to hear, mentioning that his mother only had a month left to live.
He has a brother who had received a medical scholarship to study in a prestigious University a few years back and was all alone studying abroad. He gave his brother a call and delivered the unfortunate news. He was only four months away from graduation before he could be formally known as a professional doctor.
He applied for a month leave from his professor, hoping to accompany his mother through her final days. However, his application was rejected with the reason given that if he was to stop his courses, he would not be able to graduate.
He then thanked his professor for his care, guidance and advices throughout the many years but he chose and decided to take his leave and return to his homeland to care for his mother as there is only one mother in the world to him.
When his brother returned, with the special, attentive care and companionship given to his bed-ridden mother; feeding, bathing her, cleaning up her excrement, she managed to live through for another three months.
After listening to his friend’s story, he made a firm decision to resign from his job, returned to the place he grew up, returned to be with the woman who gave him life. His mother did not want to go through the sufferings of chemotherapy and chose holistic treatment instead.
He accompanied his mother to learn Qigong and practiced it together with her. He would be next to her, teaching her patiently whenever she encountered obstacles in her learnings and practice with her continuously.
This time around, he brought his mother and father for class. As days passed by, it can be seen that the interaction among them 3 was all about warmth, delving deeper into their inner world.
One could see a 30 years old man, choking as he shared his deepest feelings but yet his face shining radiantly as his filial attitude nourishes his life, enriching his soul, touching everyone’s heart.
You could see his mother who has cancer beaming broadly because of his love.
You could see how each step he took soften his father’s pride and ego, allowing the aged couple to mesmerize the sweetness of love again.
This sharing has nourished my inner soul, flowing through my system, like a quiet, clear river.
This year, just before the Lunar New Year, my 90 years old grandfather had a stroke and broke his leg. It was also found that his oesophagus was narrowed and a nasogastric feeding tube had to be inserted.
Grandpa has always enjoyed living alone. Nobody could convince him to stay with any of his children. So mum moved him to a house which she got nearby so that he can be taken care of easily. The location of the house is very strategic and lively as my younger brother, uncle and cousin sisters and brothers live in that area. The best part, my second brother and sister-in-law live just across the street.
When Grandpa was discharged from the hospital, my parents, three aunts and uncles took turns, rotating shifts to take care of my bed-ridden grandfather 24 hours a day.
There was a professional nurse who would come over to care, made necessary treatments and check up on Grandpa. She told my parents and relatives that from her experiences as a nurse, granddad would not survive till the Chinese New Year. My mum called me up to deliver this piece of news and told me to prepare for the worst.
We went back to our hometown for the Chinese New Year celebration and initially, my mum and aunts have made a restaurant reservation of 6 tables to have a feast for my grandfather and I as we share the same birth date and it was very close to Chinese New Year. We have had such celebrations for many years however, due to Grandpa’s condition, we were not able to celebrate together this year. We were all reminded numerous times that we are not to even talk about it by our elders because according to Malaysia’s Chinese Custom, it is best to forgo celebrating birthdays when our older relatives are gravely ill.
Therefore, all of us, the children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren went to Grandpa’s house every day to gather and have meals during the Chinese New Year celebration. It was bustling with noise and excitement. Although Grandpa was bed-ridden, listening to the gleeful voices from his grand and great-grandchildren has made him feeling happy. It was as though these companionships were the best medicine where one could see the corner of his mouth rising up faintly.
He kept reminding my aunt to prepare the Red Packets (Ang Pows) for him and that he would hand it out to us each, himself.
“Dad, Happy New Year. May you be blessed with good health”.. “Grandpa, Gong Xi Fai Cai, to good health”.. “Azu, Happy Chinese New Year..” There were about 70 of us, we could see an extremely long line forming from the living room up to the kitchen! We would hold Grandpa’s hand tenderly as we take the precious Red Packets from him.
After the Chinese New Year holidays, we all returned to our own home and I called up my mother every day to check up on Grandpa’s condition. With the sincere care and accompaniment of his children and grandchildren, not only did Grandpa spent the entire Lunar New Year with us but pull out the nasogastric tube all by himself (as it was making him feeling uncomfortable) and surprised us all as he began to eat by himself!
A few days ago, my sister-in-law sent us a short video. When I played the video, Grandpa could stand and began to walk slowly!
This time around, there is an outbreak of a new pneumonia (COVID-19) pandemic. There are many elderly people living alone or nursing homes in Europe. Due to them not being able to receive the proper treatment at the right time, many of them passed away feeling lonely.
Little Yellow Flower Education Foundation did a part by supplying free food baskets for some of the poor elderly folks who lives alone during the Malaysia Movement Control Order.
I visited a nursing home with my aunt once and the administrator told us that there were more nursing homes mushrooming and it was so disheartening for him.
It is something that is not understandable as in this modern metropolis world, where we can be proud of our achievements, where the world is more advanced, civilized, technologies are more developed, goods are more refined, education levels are standing tall, why is it that we are not able to accommodate and tolerate these elderly people who have once devoted their early days to the society and sacrificed for their family?
They were also once young and energetic laborers. Why are they now forgotten and abandoned during their last years when they are the ones who needs to be cared for, and loved most?
Feeling more superiority does not bring us more happiness. The more private space we strive for, will only distance ourselves from others…..
So far… that we could not even see and remember the people or things are really matters and are worth treasuring.
Where are the family members of these aged people?
There may be many stories to it but can it be rewritten if there were less pride and a little more empathy?
The Universe creates Life and parents are the bridges that brings life into this world. Why is it that we can provide the best for our children but not for our parents?
My friend, Rene has to take care of her grandmother, her father and mother; three golden gems. She will always walk over to their house to see them, accompany them, cook delicious meals for them and take care of their daily lives. Each time I see the pictures, videos and texts she share about her grandmother and parents, I am deeply moved.
Even as an International acclaimed actress and singer, she would still try her very best to take care of the three old family members and 1 young child as any normal mother, daughter and grand-daughter will do in her everyday life.
Last year, I visited a nursing home with a friend where there were more than 60 seniors who had dementia.
They are given shelter for various reasons. There are some seniors being visited by family members occasionally whereas there are some who are being totally neglected and abandoned. Seeing some of them, fragile looking, gazing blankly into the wall, allowing loneliness to seep into their souls by the inches, waiting for death to visit them while lying on their bed in this empty, dark shed, left me feeling extremely sad.
Let us all close our eyes, recollect our childhood’s memories, picturing the silhouettes of our parents who were taking care of us. Quiet down, feel the presence of our parents now. Can we still hear their voices, sense the connection and the warmth among us?
#说一说
#父母之恩
#letstalkabout
#loveforparents
will i learn to love again who will walk with me 在 Sally Yeh Facebook 的最佳貼文
Dear Fans and Friends,
How R all of U? I hope U R all doing Ok at this difficult period in our lives. Many people are steeped in sadness, anxiety and panic. I realize there is so much negativity and strife happening all around us, as our health and world is in crisis, but it’s times like these.. that we must work harder to find the inner stillness in the midst of the storm to steady our minds and our hearts, so we can carry on, as this is the necessity of life. Sometimes it is needed to accept what it is & take this time to help ourselves and extend a helping hand to others. I know it is hard to see the POSITIVE in this situation, but we are always given 2 choices. If we don’t see the positive, we are left with the negative, and how is negative going to help? It will bring us deeper into misery and leave no room to prosper. Positive thinking, can shine a light to whatever darkness is on the horizon, and give a smile to our faces, for all things will have dark and light. I believe this is where ThinkACTPOSITVE (TAP❣️) can apply in the best way possible❣️ We can take this time to think positively, do something positive, think more deeply, and creatively, in a positive manner.
Although with thought for your health and well-being, I hope you will try to alleviate your fear, find the JOY & LOVE in this moment for someone, or something which U R so blessed with. We sometimes think of all that we lack, yet forget what we so abundantly have in our own hearts & homes❣️ I feel so blessed just to have a beating heart, two hands and legs, a thinking MIND, that we can DO something GOOD with it❣️ We can find the SILVER LINING in every single day❣️ Just realize that you are so “BLESSED”, and there is always going to be night and DAY, dark & LIGHT, rain & SHINE, moon & SUN, clouds & BLUE SKY, YOU AND ME❣️❣️❣️ We all have a CHOICE❣️❣️ Choose to TAP❣️❣️ ThinkACTPOSITVE❣️ EVERYDAY❣️❣️ FIND it in your HEART to BLESS, & LOVE EVERYONE❣️❣️❣️
In our now warm, cocooned homes, we can learn to be creative, clean out and organize our homes to put everything in an organized manner, learn something new, educate ourselves on a new skill which you can use in your future like I’ve been studying about the immune system and how to build a strong one. Research & create simple, interesting dishes at home to eat & have a cooking show with your family. Take up a sport, go out to have a wonderful walk in the colder weather, there are so many walking places in HK, enjoy nature, biking, hiking, listen to music, reading, anything which can keep us calm, serene and keeping yourself healthy if you have the extra time on your hands. It’s important to build a STRONG BODY and mind.. that is one that can get through challenges in life as there will always be ups and downs❣️
I also wanted to share that I recycle my own masks. I don’t know if it is the right way, but it seems very wasteful to use the mask just once. I put a thick tissue or hand towel paper folded into ¼ to put inside the mask so when I only need to throw the paper inside away and can save the mask in a reusable Ziploc bag and keep the mask clean by either using a hot blow dryer to blow dry the inside of the mask, and keeping the mask safely wrapped in a hand paper towel b4 using again. I have been using mine for over 1 week now❣️ I’m not asking everyone to use this method but I also feel we can try to save and recycle otherwise there will be so much more discarded masks and even the hospital does not give out masks anymore and the prices are raised too high outside for normal purchase. I also want to share that white vinegar can also be used as a disinfectant and we use a few parts vinegar and water at home to clean our floors for many years now. It is not known to kill germs, but is a good disinfectant, cleaner, biodegradable and has no smell.
Let’s try to take this time to do whatever we can think of for the HIGHEST & GREATEST GOOD and for ourselves, our family & each other❣️ Take good good care everyone❣️❣️❣️
I’m sharing a recording of a song & the beautiful scenery of the beauty we can always see if we choose to.. Pls excuse the awful jittery camera job I did.. hahaha..
Final note to all: I really hope we can be a UNITED COLLECTIVE of Individual Human beings, who can have the WHOLE HEART and GRACE to PRAY and THANK ALL those Authorities, Professionals, Big and Small, Doctors, Nurses, healthcare workers, volunteers whom leave their families behind in different cities to HELP, whom R working 24 hours a day to sheer exhaustion at the front lines in the hospitals and anywhere else to help save all those whom have been infected and fighting so hard to protect the rest of us, Globally, from being infected as well. Let's also PRAY FOR those whom have fallen sick and struggling thru the quarantines & illness. This is really a wakeup call to be compassionate to ourselves and our FELLOW MAN. No matter what we are living on this Planet together and really have to SO KIND to ourselves and all others by being GOOD to each other❣️❣️❣️❣️ Thank you all for reading and let's PRAY TOGETHER FOR THE GREATER GOOD❣️❣️❣️❣️
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE, LOVE ALL THOSE AROUND YOU❣️❣️🙏🙏😇 I HAVE YOU IN MY HEART TOO❣️❣️❣️🙏🙏😇😇
Sally
親愛的粉絲和朋友們,
大家好嗎?我希望大家在這段困難的時間都有照顧好自己。許多人沉浸在悲傷,焦慮和恐慌中。我明白現在很多人周圍可能到處都充斥著消極情緒和衝突,因為我們的健康和世界正在經歷考驗。但也正是在現在這樣的時刻,我們反而更需要努力地在暴風雨中尋找內心的平靜來穩定自己的心緒,從而得以繼續堅持下去,因為這是生活的必要功課。有的時候世事中我們不可避免會有這樣的經歷,這時候更要花點時間幫助自己,並向他人伸出援助之手。我理解在這種情況下很難看到陽光,但無論如何我們總是有兩個選擇。如果我們看不到積極的一面,那剩下就只有消極的一面了,而消極對我們又能有什麼幫助呢?這將使我們更加陷入苦惱,沒有改善和精進的餘地。積極思考,可以照亮地平線上的黑暗,在臉上重新點亮微笑,因為所有事物都會有黑暗和光明的兩面。我相信這樣的時刻正是可以運用ThinkACTPOSITVE(TAP❣️)的地方❣️我們可以花時間去積極思考,做一些正面有益的事情,以積極的方式更深入地,更有創造性地去思考。
我當然很關心大家的健康和福祉,但同時我也希望大家能減輕恐懼,在當下的此刻找到身邊的某人或某事正在帶來的喜悅和愛。有的時候我們想著的都是自己所缺少的一切,卻忘記了在各自的心中和家中其實都充滿著豐盈❣️僅僅擁有一顆跳動的心,兩隻手和兩隻腿,一個能思考的頭腦,我已經感到如此幸運,因為擁有這一切已經足夠我們去做好事,把愛傳出去❣️每天都能找到一線希望❣️人生中總會有夜晚和白天,黑暗與光明,雨和陽光,月亮和太陽,雲和藍天,你與我❣️只要意識到其實我們都是如此幸運,每個人都有選擇❣️選擇TAP❣️ ThinkACTPOSITVE❣️每天❣️❣️在你的心中找到去祝福和愛所有人的動力❣️❣️❣️
在我們如今溫暖舒適的房間裡,我們可以學習去有創造力的度過,打掃衛生並整理房屋,有條理的安置所有物品,學習新東西,自我學習掌握可以在未來用得到的知識和新技能,例如最近我就一直在研究免疫系統以及如何使自己的免疫系統更強大。在家中研究和製作簡單有趣的菜餚,並與家人一起來一場烹飪秀。從事一項運動,在寒冷的天氣中出外散散步。香港有很多適合散步的地方。享受大自然,騎單車,徒步,聽音樂,讀書… 如果你有多餘的時間,任何可以使自己保持冷靜,平靜,健康的事都是好的。擁有強壯的身體和頭腦很重要。這是可以克服生活中挑戰的一種方法,因為人生總會有起起伏伏❣️
我也想分享我是如何重複使用口罩的。我不知道這是不是正確的方法,但是只使用一次口罩就扔掉似乎很浪費。我將厚紙巾或廚房紙巾折疊,¼放入口罩內,這樣用過後我只需要將紙巾丟掉,之後將口罩保存在可重複使用的Ziploc密封袋中,並可以使用熱吹風機吹乾口罩的內部保持清潔,之後將口罩安全地包裹在擦紙巾中直到下次使用。我的口罩已經使用超過1週了❣️我並不是要每個人都使用這種方法,但我也覺得我們可以嘗試節省和回收利用,否則太多的口罩被丟掉,甚至醫院也不再分發口罩了,外面的價格相比於正常價格也提高了很多。我也想分享一下白醋也可以用作消毒劑。我們使用白醋和水加在一起在家中清潔地板已有很多年了。沒有證明說它能殺死細菌,但它是一種很好的消毒劑,清潔劑,可生物降解且沒有氣味。
讓我們嘗試利用這段時間去做我們能想到的,可以為所有人都帶來美好的事—— 為自己,為家人,為彼此❣️大家好好照顧自己❣️❣️❣️
我想分享一首歌曲的錄音,以及只要我們選擇,就可以隨時看到的美麗風景。請原諒我糟糕的攝影作品.. 哈哈哈。
最後還想和大家說:我真的希望我們可以每個人都團結在一起,可以全心全意地祈禱和感謝所有權威,專業人士,醫生們,護士們,全體醫護人員,以及志願者們 —— 他們將自己的家人留在不同的城市而去幫助他人,他們全天24小時工作,在醫院和其他任何地方的前線精疲力盡地努力工作,以挽救所有感染者,並為保護世界上所有的其他人不被感染而持續奮鬥。我們還要為那些因生病而被隔離並在掙扎著和疾病頑強抗爭的人祈禱。這是一個警鐘,提醒我們對自己和同胞抱持同情心。無論如何,我們共同生活在這個星球上,真的必須對自己和他人盡力友好善待❣️❣️❣️❣️ 謝謝大家的閱讀,讓我們一起為更大的美好祈禱❣️❣️❣️
大家情人節快樂,愛你們身邊的人們❣️❣️🙏🙏😇 你們也在我心裡❣️❣️❣️🙏🙏😇😇
Sally
https://vimeo.com/391511023
will i learn to love again who will walk with me 在 Daniel Hsu 丹尼爾 Youtube 的精選貼文
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**Music used: DJ Grumble-Sometimes Beat**
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Hi, this is Daniel.
First of all, I would like to thank all of you who are now watching this video cause you are now increasing my views right now. (Haha! Thank you~~~~)
Second, I’m really thankful for those who have responded my last video right here. (Ding) This one. I really appreciate it so much because some of you guys’ comments were like “I really love your video”, “What a nice accent”, and last “Maybe you can consider being a Youtuber!!!!!!!”
The reason why I promoted this video is that I want to provide a channel where a lot of foreigners can learn more native Chinese speaking, and the results, to be honest, was better than I originally expected. And also, to be honest, those who have shared this video to your foreign friends, I am really really really thankful for you because you guys really helped me a lot!
Thank you guys again for what you guys have done for me. Sorry for blah blah blah, again, if you would like to see more video like this kind, or you can also give me a “like” so that I know and you guys can encourage me.
Ok! So in today’s video, I would like to teach you guys another five native common phrases of Chinese. Remember, this one is more native than the last one, which is the episode one. So if you want to keep learning, justh keep watching! Let’s go!
1. The first word that I’m going to teach you guys is the word “讚”. This word is usually used when you want to say something that is really good, usually, it goes with the gesture ‘thumbs-up’. So now you know, the action of “liking” my photos on Instagram or “liking” my videos on my YouTube Channel is called “按讚” . 按 actually means “push or press” in Chinese, so “按讚” means give me a like! Also, most of the cases we use this word “讚” is when we taste something that is really delicious or yummy.
Example:
(Eating… 讚)
So, please remember this word because it is quite useful. Let’s say it again. 讚 讚 讚!!!!!
2. 傻眼 Now, guys, pay more attention to this word “傻眼” because this is way too native for Taiwanese people! “傻眼” literally means “stupid eyes”, but in Chinese, we mean “something that is so good that it makes my eyes or your eyes feel stunned” or “Something is so bad that it makes you speechless”. So this word is really useful because you can use it to express something that is so good or something that is so bad. In both cases! Maybe you don’t understand what I’m talking about! So let’s take a look at our example and you’ll more understand.
For example, maybe your friends are now having a party in the classroom and the moment when you walk in the classroom and you found the classroom was in a mess. You will be like “傻眼”. So in this case, we use “傻眼” to mean something that is so bad or something that makes you speechless. Another very good example is that when you see your friend who is typing very fast on their laptops or computers, and you’ll be like “傻眼”, “傻眼”, “傻眼”. How can you type so fast? So in this situation, we mean something that is so good and the thing makes you stunned.
Example:
傻眼 You know how to use this word, right? Let’s take a look at No.3.
3. “隨便” This word is typically used when you want to say “Whatever!” This is quite typically used when your friends offer you something that has two choices, and you need to choose one of them or one among them, but you don’t have a preference. And if you wanna say “whatever” you can say “隨便”.
Example:
A: Hey, Daniel, what do you want to eat for dinner? You want a hamburger or French fries?
B: 隨便
But remember, this is not quite suitable for you to use when you want to say it to somebody else who is elder than you. For example, your boss! You cannot use it to reply your boss, or you’ll be sacked (fired). It’s actually like English. You won’t say “Whatever” to your boss, right? So in Chinese, it’s the same case. You won’t say “隨便” to reply your boss! But, here’s the question. What do you have to say when you want to answer that both are fine for you or either is fine for you to your boss or somebody whose level is higher than you? Let’s take a look at No.4.
4. “都可以” or “我都可以”. This means “both are fine (for me)” or “Either is fine (for me)”. “都” actually means ”both, or all” in Chinese.
Example:
Boss: Daniel, what do you think we should eat for tonight’s meeting?
Daniel: 都可以。
5. “你說什麼?” “你” is “you”, “說” is “say”, “甚麼” means “what”. So in Chinese order, we’re actually saying “你說什麼” “You say what?” So it means “what did you just say?” “你說什麼?”
Example:
A: (on the phone) Yeah, you know what $%$*$*%##^@^Y*U^(^ER#%$&$%
B: Huh? 你說什麼? Huh? 你說什麼?
Thank you all!!